Scatter

Kind of a weird break so far. Been eating a ton. Like a ton a ton. It hurts almost. We had/did mochitsuki saturday, was alright. Hadn't realized, I hadn't been in two years, since we didn't do it the year grandpa died, and I guess I had finals at the time last year. Yea so that was alright, didn't really do much, but whatever. Now I'm back home, bored, stuffed, frantically playing all my games. Tryna beat them as fast as possible so I have no choice but to go buy a ps3. I'm seriously jealous of seg right now. He's totally doin the kind of trip I've promised myself I'd do when I hit my 20's or so. He's got the whole bike thing going tho, that's a little more romantic than I'm goin for. I just wanna dissapear into a foreign country for a while. Someday though. You're only young for so long right? Guh being old seems shitty. I may not be enjoying my youth, but at least I'm enjoying being young. that counts for somthing right? prbly not. disgaea is a really good game, guys. It actaully makes me chuckle even, though I enjoy childish humor like this. and seriously, its fucking endless. I've logged 60 hours and I'm nowhere near feeling accomplished. You really could play this game til you die. speaking of long legnths of time, I seriously need to shave. This happens often. I get home, stop caring, and before I know it I've got a beard. Shavings got to be up there as one of my least favorite regular things to do. its boring, its tedious, its vain, and shit its flat out dangerous. god nearly 430 now. I stay up way to late. now that im home ud think I would go to sleep earlier. Nope, bout the same time still. except since i have zero obligations i just sleep in til like 3. its not good really. heres somthing, im actually kind of excited for my sister comming home in like a week or so. havent seen her in quite a while. a year i guess, last christmas was the last time i guess. man can you imagine? what will it be like when im finally independent? will i only see my family at christmas time an such? hah fuck that would be wonderful. i always seem to be pondering the future. i think its my greatest downfall. im always thinking of the future, it makes the present hard. thinking of the present sucks tho, just makes you depressed. that unknown factor of the future makes it worthwhile to ponder. obviously the future always turns out to be shit too, but if delude yourself into thinking it might be better it makes things more fun. see what im doing here? im stalling going to bed. i don even know why. i just hate sleeping at home for some reason. something abou this place makes me want to stay up all night doing nothing. the cat does all the sleeping for me. shit it rained all day today, so the cat hasnt moved. he got up from the couch once when i fed him dinner. he knows how to live for sure. ill wrap this up here. ran out of stray thoughts. i really wish it were baseball season. im just way to fucking bored.